My new book, Mommy Tracked, is being released on August 28th.
Can’t wait until August? You can read the first chapter here!

Since red wine has been giving me headaches lately, and it’s hotter than hell out, I’ve turned my attention instead to vodka. I’m not a big fan of the martini, though, or of tacky fruity drinks, like some people in my family (coughGeorgecough). I prefer the classic and straightforward version of mixing freezer-chilled vodka with tonic water and a juicy lime wedge.
Lately, I’ve been giving my vodka and tonics a slight twist, by adding a healthy dollop of Rose’s Lime Juice. It’s basically a cross between a Vodka Tonic and a Vodka Gimlet. I’ve been trying to decide what to name this delicious concoction. A Lime Whitney, perhaps? Or a Preppy?
I’ll have to think about it.

This week: I’m taking my final bow.

Me: Look, I gave Sam a buzz cut!
George: I see that.
Me: Now he looks like a Beckham boy.
George: Well. More of a cross between a Beckham boy and a prisoner.

I’ve got deadlines, deadlines and more deadlines, and what did I spend my weekend doing?
Rehabbing an enormous mirror I snapped up at a thrift store for the Blond Tornado’s room. George took the mirror apart for me, and I spray painted the frame fire engine red. I thought the whole task would take about an hour, including drying time. But, for some odd, time-warpy reason, it took the better part of the weekend.
Oh, well. The mirror does look very cute.

The Onion: 2007 Pug Recall.

Cindy Anderson of the Sarasota, FL–based Pug Owners Group shares Kraus’s frustration with the highly developed breed.
“After trying and failing to nurse Princess Kevin through hemorrhagic lupus and Boatsley through a hysterical tubal pregnancy, I don’t know if I’ll ever own another pug,” Anderson said. “It’s not worth the hassle.”
“Oh, who am I kidding? They’re just so cute!” she added. “I love their adorable snorting and their funny little waddle. We’re going to call our next one Lopez.”

This week: on shopping and secrets.

George and I saw “Knocked Up” yesterday. In a word: hilarious.

We quickly realized that we were the only married couple in the theater. In fact, we were the only ones over the age of thirty. At all of the married jokes, we’d start snickering, while the rest of the audience would be eerily silent. Of course, they all found the bong jokes much funnier than we did, so I guess it evened out.

Best joke: “Steely Dan gargles my balls.”
Worst joke: “Go fuck your bong.”

Go fuck your bong?

Is that really what’s passing as humor among young kids today? It makes me feel like an old fart to admit this, but . . . not so funny.

UPDATE: George just emailed me this story. Apparently, Canadian author Rebecca Eckler, author of Knocked Up: Confessions of a Hip Mother-to-Be, is suing Judd Apatow and the production team of the movie Knocked Up, claiming they ripped her off her book. I wonder if her book includes bong jokes?

My entirely biased position is that Hollywood producers should never rip-off novelists. My motto: Keep that crazy movie money flowing towards the writers. In fact, if anyone’s interested in producing a movie called Mommy Tracked or Geek High (or Testing Kate, or She, Myself & I, etc., etc.) let me know . . . I am media rights are up for sale.

Calling all British readers . . . Testing Kate is now available in a special UK edition from Little Black Dress!

Buy it here.

I’ve been saying for ages that what I really want is an Airstream to park in my driveway and use as an office. It may not be practical, or affordable for that matter, but it would be really freaking cool.

Apparently, DWR has been reading my mind again. (Note to self: must get a tinfoil hat to stop that.)

The Design Within Reach Airstream . . . a bargain at only $49,066. And for that price, they even throw in a Nelson Ball Clock!